Two Lefts Don’t Make a Right

Feile  Londubh​ Festival, 19 th May 2019

Once upon a time there was a Nike runner called Schue. Schue was having a horrible time.

Every time his owner, Emma, went on a walk he was plunged into mud and poo and somehow his twin Sue always avoided it.

Sue always teased Schue about his owner dropping him to the charity shop and keeping only Sue because Schue was too dirty to wear.

Twitchy the wind-up mouse usually comforted him but this time he didn’t work and wouldn’t respond.

A cat had thought that Twitchy was a real mouse and attacked him. Schue stayed under the bed all that day crying. Schue would dream of wearing humans and putting them into muddy poo.

Schue started out as a little shoe in a charity shop and didn’t want to go back.

Emma was always complaining about how Schue was always bringing mud into the house.

Every time Schue came in she would scream, “Get out, you are too dirty!” Sue played along, using this to her advantage.

“I’m better than you,” mocked Sue, “you’re just so smelly and dirty and I’m SO clean.” Emma’s twin sister Blueberry was not much better because whenever she got something new she threw it out.

Sue hatched an evil plan to get rid of her smelly twin for good. Blueberry had beautiful shoes but she had had them for a while.

One pair was the same as Emma’s pair, Sue and Schue. Sue thought that if she shoe-napped one of Blueberry’s shoes and made Schue go in and take its place, that Blueberry would throw Schue into the charity shop for good. So that night, Sue ventured out from her bed and she was about to go out the door to Blueberry’s room, when she saw something moving…