P.S. (I Love) I'll Dump You

4th Class, Whitecross National School, 27th May 2009
This is a story about a talking cactus named Bobsticles. He had an evil wife named Spikella who had a moustache. His life’s ambition was to dump her and find the perfect wife. His best friend Nibbles, the sombrero wearing, banjo playing hamster, was to help him. Nibbles played in a band called Country Hamsters. They all lived in Mexico.

Bobsticles and Spikella had seen several marriage counsellors, many of whom had quit because Spikella was too hard to handle. But now Bobsticles had had enough and one night he ran away. He left Spikella a note saying, “Gone Fishing… Forever.”
He met up with Nibbles. Nibbles’ band was going on a world tour. He invited Bobsticles to come along to find the perfect wife.

After unsticking himself from all of the passengers on the plane, Bobsticles went to sleep in Nibbles’ RV. Bobsticles had a nightmare and said to Nibbles, “I’m after having a nightmare that Spikella was on a rampage to find me.”

But then he found out it wasn’t a nightmare. He looked out the window and saw Spikella coming.

“AHHH! I want to go somewhere else!” screamed Bobsticles. “Get to the airport. We’re leaving.

“But I can’t reach the pedals!” said Nibbles. Nibbles pressed the big red button and the van turned into a jet.  The jet took off flying. Nibbles kept beeping the horn with his big belly.

Then they saw that Spikella was holding on to the back of the jet. So Nibbles started flying around in circles to try and shake her off, but the engine flames singed her spikes. She fell into a pond of water and grew into a huge, giant cactus.     

“No, get away! Leave me alone. I’m trying to find a new wife,” Bobsticles screamed...